Unrequited lesson

She stared down into the brown bottle, her eyes lidded with disgruntled betrayal. The actions of the former night playing in her head, constantly on repeat. She had always reached out to him in attempts to build a bridge that seemed too rickety to cross. He had always turned her down, and one more rotted plank would fall from the ratted rope, until finally there was only one way to cross; dive and pray.

"Rick." Her not so distant past yelled into the microphone of her head. The cold cement formed under the brown bottle, then under her feet, until finally she glanced up into the dead-of-night blackness that was Colorado weather. Not even breached into October, as a single yellow street light filled the small parking lot. The woman's eyes lidded as she felt herself fade into nostalgia, and into a memory that still ran deep.

The parking lot was void of all except the scattered few cars in the distance, unimportant and vague, and the two cars that sat close to the young woman running, and the young man fumbling absentmindedly. The woman leaned as she ran, waving the man down as she gripped the brown jacket of questionable origins that slung around her shoulders and chest. The blue and brown stringed scarf unfurling around her neck as her short hair curled. "Rick! Wait!" She demanded; smiling as his blue eyes turned to her half-heartedly.

She stood in front of this man that she always admired; that spark in his ice blue eyes that ignited whenever he made something wonderful, or whenever he would laugh at her antics, or anyone's antics for that matter. Tonight though, his eyes were lack-luster, and that laugh was dulled into a low grumble of a yawn. He was always so tired…her heart dropped whenever he couldn't sleep, or when he left without a good-bye.

"What?" His grumble brought her out of her mind, and she inhaled slowly through open lips, as her eyes looked over his leaning stature. She smiled brightly at him, before pausing and dropping her curled lipped expression subconsciously. Her eyes lidded as they glanced away. He stared at her; a few moments passed, before he continued with his fumbling. "I'll leave if you-"his coy words were interrupted with a hand to the arm.

"Wait." She said suddenly, gaining his attention once more. He physically sighed before turning to her once more, his attention short. "This…is really hard. For me to say." Her hazel eyes danced out of view of his questioning ones. After a pause, she continued. "I…I love you…I think I love you. I-I know it isn't a crush. Cus, like, I really really like you." She took a deep breath at the end of her confession, her eyes searching for his nervously.

They were unimpressed.

Her heart stopped, and her throat closed.

He planted his hand on her head, and ruffled. Hazel eyes widened at this action, as they glossed over.

Nothing? Was this all there was? Just a simple ruffle of the hair, and forget it all happened?

The words stammered out of her lips. "D-didn't you hear me? I love you!" Her voice didn't betray her eyes.

A smirk rose from him as his hand left her head. "Sure."

She lost all feeling in her arms.

The smirk was gone by then, and was replaced by an indifferent scowl. She stared at his back for the next few seconds, as her mind lagged.

"Why?" Her voice shook as she flexed her hands. Still no feeling.

His head turned, a steel eye cast onto her.

"Why don't…" Her fingers grazed her wet cheeks. They felt so hot in the 35 degree weather.
Arms surrounded her, circles grazing in echoes onto her skin. His head planted onto hers, as a growl echoed into her ear kindly. "I enjoy your company, but I don't feel the same."
Her arms wrapped around him gently, knuckles grazing his back softly, and she closed her eyes.

Her hands slid over her face as the cold, unforgiving parking lot faded from her mind's eye. They shined in the light of the overhead.

She didn't understand. She felt happy around him, he made her feel good about herself, she actually felt like she had a purpose when she was with him, instead of the old bump-n-grind of daily life. She thought he felt the same way. What about their night together? Did that mean nothing at all? Didn't he like her at all?

Her head flopped back as she stared up at the ceiling. At least she knew where Drew was coming from now.